Configuring Sharepoint 2010 to send email (and receive) with SBS 2011 when Sharepoint is on a different server

I having the following:

Server running SBS 2011 and email is on that as part of SBS

On a seperate server:

Sharepoint 2010 Enterprise.

(I also have companyweb sharepoint running on the SBS box.)

I am trying to setup how to send out and when that is set up receive email to my seperate sharepoint sever.

I have looked at the following link but am not sure how to do this with the above setup.   Can someone point me in the right direction?  I have looked at other articles but they usually are for a Exchanger server setup and I don't want to break SBS. 

Thanks.

http://technet.microsoft.com/en-us/library/cc287948.aspx

I have followed the instructions in this link with no luck.

Title: Configuring outgoing email in SharePoint 2010 with Exchange 2010 – Step by Step Guide

URL:http://sharepointgeorge.com/2010/configuring-outgoing-email-sharepoint-2010/